Sometimes a temporary reprieve comes from an unexpected source. Tonight I watched Seven Pounds again. Rowdy and I started watching it together, even though we're not in the same place. The timing was a little bit off, but it worked out pretty well overall. We were able to talk about it as we went.
I saw that movie when it came out in theaters. I loved it then and I loved it now. Even though it's so incredibly sad, I also find it somehow uplifting, not just because of the amazing performances and the inspired screenwriting, cinematography, and directing. The part that really touches me is the humanity of it. It's so raw and real. There's no pretension, no Hollywood touch-ups, no predictability, no happy ending. It's a lot more like real life than most of the movies that come out on the big screen. Except that I hope it's not like most people's real life. Because that would suck for them.
Watching it made me feel more relaxed than I have in a while. I mean, I've been slowly unwinding over the past few days anyway, but this really helped. As soon as it was done, of course, the tension started coming back, but I managed to keep it at bay long enough to talk to Rowdy without getting into a big discussion for once. That's always a good thing.
I don't know what it means to be in a relationship, exactly. I'm not sure what the definition is. I've been trying to find the boundaries and the rules and figure out what this artificial label actually signifies in practice. But maybe Rowdy's been right all along. Maybe I just think too much. And I think I'm passing that on to him. Now he's starting to think too much.
I can still feel the thunder on the horizon though and it's not getting any farther away. However, right now it's not getting any closer either, so I guess I should just enjoy the sunshine while it lasts. Or more like the mix of sun and cloud.